"In grammar school they taught me that a frog turning into a prince was a fairy tale. In the university they taught me that a frog turning into a prince was a fact!" -Ron Carlson
Things That Piss Me Off #3,472: People who don't read (not can't; won't.)
Ah, the joys of modern technology. Among the many things available to the average 21st century human is the ability to buy tickets to just about any attraction known to man at your local grocery store. Unfortunately, the intelligence of the average 21st century human has yet to catch up to this amazing innovation. For instance, it is now possible to buy ticket cards (the size of a credit card or gift card) to the zoo I work at from Vons stores. BUT! It takes 24 hours for the ticket card to be activated after Vons sells it so that our computers at the entrance turnstiles will recognize the card. The guest would know of this if they bothered to look at the ticket card and read some of the handy words printed on it. Alas, they do not, and we get at least a dozen ticket cards a day that, when scanned, come up as "Unknown Ticket" because they were just purchased. The guest then must walk all the way over to the Guest Relations window (a grueling ten feet or so) where the card can be looked up, and then exchanged for tickets that will actually scan. Of course, this is all the zoo's fault, not the fault of the poor, put-upon zoo visitor who shouldn't have to read anything to get through life.
Oh, and apparently the panda's pregnant. Please, dear God, keep away the stupid people who will want us to trot the baby panda out as soon as it's born, because of course newborn pandas are as cute and fuzzy as a bouncy six-month-old Golden Retriever puppy, not tiny and pink and hairless. And they're audioanimatronic anyway, so we can program them to do whatever the guests want. [/sarcasm]
