"In grammar school they taught me that a frog turning into a prince was a fairy tale. In the university they taught me that a frog turning into a prince was a fact!" -Ron Carlson
They're out, they just like to piss dumb people like you off by hiding in their enclosure. We don't keep our animals in six foot by six foot concrete cages so you can see them all the time. Deal with it.
"We waited half an hour for the shuttle to pick us up and bring us down here, and there aren't even any tigers to see!"
Tough. I've been standing here for an hour and I've got another two hours to go, and when I'm done, I don't even get a ride on the shuttle back up to the entrance. Go complain to someone who cares. Like that tree over there.
"Are they safe there?" (pointing to a mother duck and ducklings behind me off the path)
They're a lot safer behind me and this chain than they would be out among you crazies.
"Is that a mixed breed?" (pointing to the Okapi)
Yeah, it's a cross between a Zebra and a Bantha. We picked it up at the Mos Eisley Animal Shelter last week. Budget cuts you know.
I swear, people get stupider every day. And that doesn't even count the people today who didn't seem to realize they had to go to the shows (and at a scheduled time, no less!), the shows don't just come to them wherever they happen to be, whenever they want them.
