"In grammar school they taught me that a frog turning into a prince was a fairy tale. In the university they taught me that a frog turning into a prince was a fact!" -Ron Carlson
...I do have a blog around here. So. I'm back at the zoo. Although I'm starting to think I shouldn't have, at least not this early in the year. School's still in session, which means we have school groups coming every day. And guess which department gets the joy of trying to organize each group sufficiently to get them in the gates. Yep. And that's all I've been doing for the last week and a half. Of course the parents are worse than the kids half the time. They, along with many other people who come to visit the zoo, are under the odd impression that the zoo is there to serve their every whim. Got news for you folks. The zoo is a non-profit organization. Those are some big words, so I'll try to explain it in a way that someone with the IQ of a houseplant might be able to understand. It means that the zoo depends on big donations to keep running, not the measly few dollars you spend to walk in the gate. That means THE CUSTOMER IS NOT ALWAYS RIGHT! We don't have to bow to your every demand. No, my manager does not, in fact, care that your precious little angels demons have to stand out here and wait while your group leader checks the group in, which is taking a long time because you weren't sufficiently organized when you got here. It's your fault, not mine. No, we can't just let you waltz in whenever you feel like it; we have to know how many kids you have. And if you don't know how many kids you have, you're just plain stupid. There's no other word for it. What idiot would take a bunch of preschoolers to the zoo, without the faintest idea of just how many ankle biters they're supposed to have with them? Do they not care if they lose one? I'm not overly fond of children, but even I'm aware that losing a kid in the zoo might be a problem. Could be. You know, when the parent comes to pick them up after school and they're not there. But that's not my problem. My only concern is to make sure they're checked in before they storm the gates. They really shouldn't call our position "Front Plaza," it should be "Interception." And we should get hazardous duty pay. Seriously. I came this close to wringing a couple of second grade necks today. I don't like kids. I tolerate them only because they belong to somebody else and I know my misery is temporary. But they make it supremely difficult to do even that sometimes.
On the upside though, the shift is short, since the school groups tend to get there between 9:00 and 10:30. After that it's stuffing maps or odd jobs around the zoo until 12:45 when I get to go home. I really can't wait until the summer. Shifts that go till 2300, yes, hauling barricades around the zoo, yes, but no school groups from hell to deal wtih.
